Why did I wait so long?
I trusted there would be time in spades,
years and decades to further our friendship,
hone the edges of our razor wits –
or did we only imagine we were funny?
I confided truths I hid from the world,
trusting you to embalm them,
bury them deep,
just as I keep your secrets still,
taking them out occasionally
unfolding them gently,
reminding myself you were larger than my mere humanity,
full of joy and generosity,
with an appetite for so much I feared.
Your example emboldened me,
allowed me to pursue the pleasure of discomfort,
the unease of thrusting myself beyond
Now, more fully formed,
more insinuated into the universe of others,
I sample the world you bequeathed
while you rest in your sarcophagus
beneath the lush landscape
no longer wondering
why I waited so long.
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